Recently, The Hollywood Reporter published an article highlighting the growing prominence of intimacy coordinators in the film industry. Featuring interviews with intimacy coordinator Mam Smith and award-winning adult filmmaker Erika Lust, the article lauded the positive presence they have had on the sets of sexually charged films and series such as Challengers, Poor Things, and I May Destroy You. Recognizing the strides the industry has made in dealing with issues of coercion and abuse that many actresses have had to suffer for decades while shooting intimate scenes in a largely unregulated, male-dominated environment – thanks in part to the growing demand for intimacy coordination in the wake of the #metoo movement – Lust goes so far as calling for awards recognition for intimacy coordinators at the Oscars, Golden Globes, and Emmys.
I must admit, while this suggestion makes for a buzzy headline, it seems rather far-fetched. How would such a category be judged? What would the best intimacy coordinator award be recognizing exactly? The article compares intimacy coordination to casting, which will be recognized as an official Oscar category as of 2026, but the results of casting are right there to be seen on the screen. The true value of the intimacy coordinator’s role is felt behind the scenes, in the most private and intimate of settings.
Perhaps more saliently, not everyone agrees that intimacy coordination is such a good thing. While many big names such as Kate Winslet, Emma Thompson, and Yorgos Lanthimos have come out in favour, there is no shortage of actors and directors who object to their presence, arguing that intimacy coordinators are a hindrance to spontaneity and artistic freedom on set.
While not so surprising to hear men of a certain era, such as Michael Douglas and Sean Bean, come out against the need for the role, it is interesting to see how many women in the industry are in opposition to the practice. In addition to high profile actresses such as Jennifer Aniston and Toni Colette, one of the most prominent voices questioning the need for intimacy coordinators is respected independent filmmaker Mia Hansen-Løve. Referring to intimacy coordinators as “the virtue police,” Hansen-Løve insists they are unnecessary on her sets, and that she is fully capable of creating a sensitive and respectful environment without their interference. Others, such as Colette, have gone as far as to say that on occasion the intimacy coordinator’s presence has made her more anxious.
To be sure, for all the very real issues intimacy coordination serves to address, many new ones are quickly cropping up. As Smith and Lust point out, the industry has grown so quickly that it’s a bit like “the Wild West” out there, highlighting the need for greater regulation. While certification programs do exist, right now just about anyone can market themselves as an intimacy coordinator, regardless of their training. Unfortunately, for all the positives a skilled intimacy coordinator can bring to a production, if anyone can call themselves an intimacy coordinator, without greater scrutiny and regulation they may have the potential to do more harm than good in some extremely vulnerable situations.
This being said, filmmaking remains an endeavour marked by huge power imbalances, which are easy for the most powerful members of the production to be blind to. Too many times, I have observed first-hand as more junior members of the cast and crew have been directly and indirectly pressured into doing things they are uncomfortable with, and whether Hansen-Løve and Colette feel comfortable working without an intimacy coordinator, that certainly isn’t the case for everyone. Regardless of some of the negative opinions out there, intimacy coordinators seem to be here to stay, and while the new issues this presents must be urgently addressed, I believe their presence is making a positive impact on the industry overall. One would never suggest that the presence of a safety team or stunt coordinator hampers the artistic merit and spontaneity of a complicated car chase or shootout sequence. Because without them people get hurt. Or worse. And to anyone who claims that intimacy coordinators suck the life out of intimate scenes, I challenge you to watch Normal People and see if you still feel the same.
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